The Judgment Drop The Serious Version
by RoyboyX
Summary: A more serious  but still comical  version of the story I just posted. Also more in-depth. Don't take everything in here seriously. Also I'm still new to this site so that's why these two stories are seperate. Still need to learn multiple chapter stories.


"Transmitting last room data, now…"

Samus had just completed Aether navigation. It had been a rather boring job for her, and she was on the verge of suicide. Conveniently for her, she'd happened to finish the project in Judgment Drop of the Ing Hive, which she soon found to be aptly titled. Hoping that the black abyss below would swallow her up, Samus jumped to her hopeful death.

Unluckily for her, death would not come.

Two Space Pirates were below the black hole, which existed as a gateway to another area of Dark Aether. Both of these Pirates were unlucky as well. They considered varying ideas for the best way to kill Samus, something they had never taken success in. Eventually, they grew frustrated.

"I wish Samus would just drop dead!"

Suddenly, he fell to the ground, crushed by a falling force. He stood up to find a crumpled heap of white to his side; after several seconds, he realized that this heap of white was the very person he had been speaking about seconds ago. He turned her over so that he could look into her visor, and saw her eyes to be closed. The Pirate then did a quick scan of her and found that she had not suffered any visible damage from the fall, because he himself had broken it, although she was very clearly dead.

Taking her helmet off, the Pirate held it to the other.

"Go tell it on the base, that Samus Aran is dead. Tell them… I, Gesich-Yraev Jmabla, killed Samus using the least likely weapon – pure, dumb, luck." the Pirate said in his garbled language.

The news quickly spread, as he had wished. Every surviving and un-possessed Space Pirate on Aether, and those across the galaxy, received the news that Samus Aran was dead, and came to the planet to celebrate. A feast had been organized, of typical Space Pirate food, such as Scritters and Phazon.

Samus had been laid to rest in a glass casket, at the suggestion of one Pirate, who had read a foreign tale of human origin, named something along the lines of _"White Snow"_. Total garbage, the story was to him. He'd scoffed at the thought of a happy ending after death from food poisoning. However, the Pirates had deemed her, even for a human (especially their main threat, bounty hunter Samus Aran) to be so beautiful that they had to reveal her.

And so, they penetrated her armor, carefully removing it from her nervous system and then reassembling it off of her, to be presented to their leader, Ridley himself. Her flowing blonde hair had been carefully rearranged, and the Pirates were discussing methods with which to remove her Zero Suit.

Ridley, leader of the Space Pirates himself, entered the party room, a glass of Plated Beetle blood in his hand, his entrance silencing the room. Sipping his beverage, he approached the deceased body of Samus, running a claw down the line markings on her Zero Suit.

Quickly then, he grabbed her by the neck and held her in the air.

"It is today, that I announce the victory of the Space Pirates. Samus Aran, our longtime nemesis, is dead!"

The crowds erupted in cheer, too drunk to notice that Samus' eyes were beginning to flutter. She was set back in her casket, where she began to sit up.

"W-What is going on here…?" she asked. The crowd grew silent as she found herself surrounded by her enemies. She had the feeling that _every single one of them_ was here. She was right.

Samus looked to her left to find her Light Suit. Getting off of her glass coffin, she approached the suit and let it materialize over her body. "I'll take that, thank you."

The Pirates, after a split second, began screaming and running in circles. The first thing Samus did with her chance, to finally put her long battles with the Space Pirates to rest, was seal each door with Chozo code. She did not kill any Pirates just yet.

With each door sealed, Samus removed her helmet so as to reveal her beautiful yet terrifying face to the Pirates. She extracted a Power Bomb from her internal systems, set it to explode after ten seconds, and then walked casually up to a Pirate to shove it down his throat. The Pirate did not choke, due to the difference between inner body systems of Space Pirates and that of humans.

Samus was sure that the Power Bomb had made it to the Pirates esophagus when a blinking yellow light shone through its torso. Inside her Arm Cannon, Samus flipped the switch for the Missile control hatch, and four flaps were released from the barrel. The inside of her barrel became covered by green, and Samus gave off her best evil laugh as she fired off five Super Seeker Missiles at the Pirate with the Power Bomb.

Just after that, Samus jumped up and out of the crowd of running and screaming Pirates. She kicked in her Screw Attack and wall-jumped to the top of the tower, while every single Space Pirate in existence, including Ridley, was wiped out.

The bounty hunter called in her ship to perform a Missile strike, which blew a hole completely through the tower. Satisfied, the giggling hunter backflipped up to the top of her ship, and moonwalked into the hatch, before flying off.


End file.
